Monday, June 29, 2015

Gay Marriage and Children

First, let me make clear what my opinion is of gay marriage.  I believe there isn't enough love in the world, and if two people fall in love and want to commit themselves for life, let them, no matter if they are the same sex or different sexes. Marriage is a personal thing, and it's a shame that we had to get the government involved, but we did; they spoke; and now it's the law.

This is the perfect time to bring up the subject in front of the children. The transgender issue has been in the news lately and now gay marriage, so it is a fine time to have this as a dinner conversation topic. Depending on the child and the child's age, you might start with a general question such as "What do you think about the ruling approving gay marriage?" It is important to make sure that the child feels he/she is part of the conversation and that it doesn't turn into a lecture from Mom, Dad, or Grandma or Grandpa.

Having the child air his/her views first also makes sure that they don't just agree with your view because they feel bullied or they think you will be angry if they disagree with you. Listen to them and even mirror back what they said to make sure you understand what they are saying: "So, you think gay marriage is weird?" The next question is the most important: "Why?" It is fine for children to have opinions that are different from ours, but it is important they know that an opinion should be based on correct information and not just what the majority of his/her friends say. We want to raise independent thinkers.

If the two of you disagree, the next part of the conversation should be about respect and tolerance. No matter what your views, it is not OK to belittle and shame those who feel differently or do differently. If they hear someone else do it, it is the right thing to do to help the person being bullied and ridiculed.  This kind of conversation can have long reaching effects and might even help your child deal with bullying situations at school.

The important message to get across is to remember that the adults in a child's life have a great impact on a child, even if we don't think so, and we can help them navigate these issues with intelligence and compassion.

I hope I can get a dialogue started here. Please feel free to post your views here and other suggestion on how to deal with these sensitive issues with the children in our lives.

Wednesday, June 10, 2015

Guest Blogger Nana Pat (Pat Pauli Dreyer)



The Tattooed Grandma asked me, Nana Pat, to write something for her blog about some of the things I do with my two grandsons. I am helping to raise them; I like the sound of that rather than babysitter. I have them two to three times a week for 10-11 hours a day. We play outside at the water table and sandbox, we play inside with toys I saved from my children and some new yard sale finds, we ride bikes up and down the driveway, we play school to learn reading, writing and numbers and we try to make crafty things. The boys don't care too much for artsy crafty things so I have to be creative. Finger painting was good, gifts for mom and dad were ok, but food crafts were a big hit.



We have made banana bread, cookies, slime, Play-Doh and ice cream. Slime was really simple. We used 1 box of corn starch and a pitcher of water, and food coloring. Start with about a 1/4 cup of the corn starch and slowly add a 1/2 cup of the water. Slowly add more corn starch and water, mixing thoroughly until you have the amount you want and the mixture is as thick as honey. About a box of cornstarch and 1-2 cups of water should make enough slime for 2-3 kids. You can add food coloring or split the mixture up and make each batch a different color. Once the desired color has been reached, dip you hands in and feel the slime. As you play with it, notice how it acts like a solid, then a liquid. It should not splash if it is made correctly. The kids will love it!



Edible Play-Doh was also a big hit! We had used real Play-Doh with some of the kits that it comes in. But edible Play-Doh was more fun because you got to eat it when you were done. We used Peeps from Easter (but regular marshmallows would probably work as well) coconut oil (it’s really a solid) and powdered sugar. In a large microwaveable bowl place three Peeps and one big tablespoon of the coconut oil. Set the microwave for 20-30 seconds. The Peeps will grow puffy and big. Stop the microwave when the oil melts and the Peeps grow puffy. Take the bowl out and start stirring. It will be very sticky, so add 1-2 teaspoons of powdered sugar. Add more powdered sugar as needed. If you use marshmallows you could add food coloring for color, not necessary for Peeps because they are colored already, but you could add some for a deeper color. Put the powdered sugar on your hands to make it easier to handle. It's oiler than Play Doh, but much more yummy! After playing with the mixture, it can be stored (fresh Peeps store for 2-3 days, stale Peeps harden quickly) or eaten!



We also made ice cream from snow. This winter we put bowls outside to collect freshly fallen snow. You need about 8 cups of snow, 1 (14 ounce) can of sweetened condensed milk, 3/4 cups of sugar or to taste, and 1 1/2 teaspoons of vanilla extract (for vanilla ice cream.) You could also add chocolate chips, chocolate milk, cocoa, strawberry Quick or any flavor you want. Thin plastic bowls reduce melting (I found out the hard way not to use metal bowls) and some people use chocolate syrup, but I used Hershey's unsweetened cocoa because of the sugar and sweetened milk already there. You need to stir, stir, and stir. (No hand mixers, they will make it thin.) Put it in the freezer for 30-60 minutes and stir, stir, stir again. We took turns stirring. They loved it! I thought the vanilla was good, but the boys prefer chocolate ice cream. So I added the cocoa powder and that was a winner!



Enjoy the kids and the fun!